Giants opt to implode in the seventh inning

Well, that was a choice. Not a good one, but a choice nonetheless.

The San Francisco Giants won back-to-back games in hilarious fashion to round out their series with the Los Angeles Dodgers. Those ruthlessly entertaining games featured the Giants applying pressure on the Dodgers until they imploded.

It’s fun to watch. It’s kind of rude, but I like that. It’s like watching a magician control a confused spectator. It’s an unfair game. It’s rigged against the imploder. You can’t stop watching.

The Giants were the imploder on Friday night against the Pittsburgh Pirates. Mind you, the Pirates did not apply the pressure that the Giants did to the Dodgers. The Pirates just stood there blankly, as they’ve done all season. They pulled out the deck of cards, not knowing the trick, asked the spectator to draw one and remember it, and the Giants drew it, promptly forgot the number, and then vomited all over the cards, ruining the deck.

It was the seventh inning and the seventh inning only where the damage occurred. The Giants had scrapped back after falling down 3-0, courtesy of home runs by both Steven Duggar and Alex Dickerson.

Try and forget about the fact that the Giants lost and just enjoy those homers. They’re pretty. They’re fun to watch. They deserve your love and support.

The seventh inning, however, does not deserve your love and support. It deserves tomatoes thrown at it, except only fake tomatoes because it’s not a good idea to waste any food, let alone one as perfect as tomatoes.

Dominic Leone was pitching for the Giants, and he started things off by walking Jacob Stallings.

That was a mistake.

On a 2-1 pitch to Kevin Newman, Stallings took off for second base. Newman grounded it to shortstop, and Thairo Estarda — either unaware that Stallings was stealing (say that ten times fast), or misreading how much time he had — tried to get the out at second. They did not get the out at second. It was not particularly close. They did not get the out at first, either.

That was a mistake.

Leone — who threw just 10 of his 25 pitches for strikes — then walked Wilmer Difo on five pitches to load the bases.

That was a mistake.

Leone then walked Adam Frazier, just for good measure, giving the Pirates a 4-3 lead.

That was a mistake.

Leone then got Ke’Bryan Hayes to put the ball on the ground, and the Giants got the first out at home.

That was not a mistake. Progress!

In came Jarlin García who struck out the Pirates best hitter, Bryan Reynolds, with the bases loaded and just one out.

That was also not a mistake. Continued progress!

Then García got Ben Gamel to ground the ball to first base, and when LaMonte Wade Jr. tried to exchange the ball to toss it to first, he dropped it, allowing a run to score, and when he went to retrieve the ball he dropped it again, allowing a second run to score.

That was a mistake. Two, really. One step forward, two steps back.

The Giants trailed 6-3, and that was enough. They didn’t threaten again until two outs in the ninth, when they got one of the runs back on a walk by Darin Ruf and a triple by Wade. 6-4 was the final.

It was an ugly game, but ugly games happen. Here are a few other notes on it:

• The Giants were facing a pitcher, Chad Kuhl, who had just 45 strikeouts in 56.1 innings, and who hadn’t struck out more than seven batters in a game all season. The first eight Giants he retired were by strikeout. The Giants struck out 14 times on the day, including a combined seven from their first two hitters, Wade and Mike Yastrzemski.
• Buster Posey doubled twice. He might have a decent career ahead of him. Seems like a good prospect.
• Giants first-round pick Will Bednar was in attendance, and his brother David Bednar pitched the eighth inning for Pittsburgh. Wholesome! Will and David are just like me and my brother, if me and my brother had a whole lot of athletic talent.
• Johnny Cueto didn’t have a good start, but he did draw a walk and then … stole a base. For the first time in his career. We’ll send you into the weekend with that image.